|Scott and his friends are trapped at school, in the middle of the night, while a werewolf hunts after them.|
|Hey students of all ages, do you hate your school? Think all your teachers are imbeciles, your classmates are idiots, and going to class is the worst? WELL SUCK IT UP. AT LEAST YOU AREN’T BEING HUNTED BY A FUCKING WEREWOLF IN YOUR DAMN SCHOOL.|
|This episode begins with Scott and Stiles in a bit of a pickle. Derek Hale is dead, the big bad Alpha is chasing after them, and the boys are trapped inside their high school in the middle of the night. Their situation turns from bad to worse when the Alpha breaks into the school through the locked doors. With their lives on the line, Scott and Stiles just keep on running!!!|
|They obviously can’t outrun an angry werewolf, so the boys come up with various strategies to outsmart their attack and stay alive in the school.|
|STRATEGY: Jump out the window, make a mad dash outside to the parking lot, and climb into Stiles’ truck for a lucky getaway. Keep fingers crossed during the whole time.
FOILED BY: Um yeah, one step ahead of you buddy. The Alpha ripped out the car battery and hurled it away.
|STRATEGY: Try every alternative exit you can find. There must be one unobstructed door somewhere in this building, right?
FOILED BY: The Alpha personally locked and/or blocked every door in the school. There is no possible escape.
|STRATEGY: Hide in a room with no windows where two teenage guys can be intimate with each other and start making out passionately without being detected. They’re going to die anyway, so why not profess their undying love while sweaty, wet, and naked (whoops sorry, not a strategy, that must have been my imaginative cat fantasizing on the keyboard).
FOILED BY: The locker room is already occupied. *BAM!deadjanitor*
|STRATEGY: Use a little trickery and trap the Alpha inside a room by blocking off the only door.
FOILED BY: Doors are overrated. Look up, boys. The werewolf just climbed up to the ceiling and will attack you from above.
|Stiles: Welp, I’m all out of brilliant ideas and ninja turtles, I’m afraid.
Scott: WTF!? I thought you were supposed to be the brains behind this operation?
Stiles: I’m not dying here! I’m not dying at school! ;_;
Scott: This night can’t get any worse…
|OH SNAP IT JUST DID.
Allison was supposed to meet up with Scott tonight, but she’s worried that her boyfriend hasn’t shown up in half an hour. He sends her a mysterious text message, ordering her to go to the school. Allison brought along her ragtag team of friends since she needed a ride, so Jackson and Lydia are also at the high school as well.
|Now that the gang is all here, Scott has some explain’ to do! He obviously did not send that text message in between his running away from the werewolf. It was a trap to lure his friends into danger. Before he could explain what is going on, the Alpha is approaching closer and closer to them…|
|Scott tells his friends (and Jackson lol) to RUN, RUN, RUN and not look back. Judging by what’s running after them, these teenagers have a very good reason to run like hell, unless they want to be made into human mincemeat~~~|
|They locked themselves into the cafeteria for temporary safety. Allison is seriously freaking out and demands an explanation. Stiles gallantly steps up, tells the group that the janitor is dead, and then lets Scott finish the rest of the story. Oh gee, thanks for contributing, Stiles! *lol*
Unable to recuperate from the grenade that his best friend just launched, Scott starts *nervousing* and *angsting* about telling Allison the truth.
|In the heat of the moment, Scott throws a certain dead wolf under the bus and sputters out that Derek is the one chasing after them! The lie gets more ridiculous as Scott is under more pressure. He even blames Derek for killing his own sister & all the other deaths around town too!
Ghost Derek is looking down from the pearly gates and goes DAYUM SON, WAIT UNTIL I COME BACK TO LIFE NEXT EPISODE TO KICK UR SCRAWNY ASS.
|Jackson wants Stiles to call his police sheriff father to the rescue. Stiles, however, doesn’t want to put his own dad in danger when there’s a homicidal werewolf at loose. He snaps, “No! Do you wanna hear it in Spanish!?” which is a very weird and irrelevant comeback, unless Teen Wolf is trying to appeal to the Latin America demographic.|
|Lydia calls the police department for help, but they immediately hang up on her!!! *lolwut* Apparently, some anonymous caller tipped off the police that there’d be prank calls throughout the night. That’s a good enough excuse for these lazy irresponsible bitches (so Jackson was right about the rent-a-cops in his Episode 5 tirade) who won’t investigate a distressed citizen’s call!
Allison insists on flooding the police department with phone calls until they finally respond. However, Stiles is like “Can we just gloss over this ridiculous plot hole because the writers need a way to keep us locked inside the school!?”
|It makes sense for them to contact the police, but Stiles is still reluctant to send his dad to the school grounds and get killed, knowing exactly what the Alpha is capable of.
Jackson: Okay assheads, new plan! Stiles calls his useless dad and tells him to send someone with a gun and a decent aim. Are we good with that!?
|Jackson and Stiles have a “scuffle” over the phone. By “scuffle”, I mean Stiles just flails his arms around and somehow lands a fake punch in Jackson’s face. In the end, Stiles buckles down to peer pressure and leaves an urgent message in his dad’s voicemail. There’s no telling when Papa Stiles will respond back though.|
|The werewolf begins pounding furiously at the cafeteria doors, which means it’s time to move the plot along and relocate to a different part of the school!|
|They run up the stairs and hide inside the chemistry classroom. We get an unintentionally hilarious moment where Scott uses one measly lab chair to bolt the door shut, as if that would make the difference when the Alpha comes breaking into the room. And everyone just stares at him like “Wow, you really ARE a dumbass, Scott.” *lol*|
|Scott comes up with a new plan. They’re to leave through the emergency exit to the rooftop, then climb down the fire escape, and finally all squeeze in together inside Jackson’s car. The only problem is that the door is locked, so Scott wants to retrieve the keys from the janitor’s dead body.|
|The others think it’s too dangerous for Scott to go outside unarmed, so Scott grabs this pointer stick as his, erm, *weapon*. Everyone just gives him that DUMBASS U SRS? look again.|
|On the other end of the intelligence spectrum, stealthy genius Lydia suggests that they use the chemicals in the classroom to build a “self-igniting Molatav Cocktail”, which is just a fancy way to say firebomb.
Lydia: “A Molotov cocktail is a breakable bottle containing a flammable substance such as gasoline or a napalm-like mixture & usually a source of ignition such as a burning cloth wick held in place by the bottle’s stopper. The wick is usually soaked in alcohol or kerosene.” *blinks* HOW DO YOU GUYS NOT KNOW THIS!?
|Lydia concocts a magical potion for Scott, but Allison still thinks this is a crazy idea for him to risk his life and leave the safety of this classroom.|
|Allison: Remember when you told me that you knew when I was lying, and that I had a tell? Well, so do you. You’re a horrible liar, and you’ve been lying all night.
Scott: But how can you tell I’m lying when I look confused all the time?
|We get a sinister shot of that evil bastard Jackson, smirking smugly as he listens in to their conversation.|
|Allison does her best to persuade Scott to stay in the classroom, but he leaves anyway to retrieve the keys. That is the only way Scott can think of to save his friends.|
|We get a pretty atmospheric sequence where Scott wanders the school hallways, with a flask of dangerous chemicals in his hand, not knowing if the Alpha is lurking at every corner.|
|His werewolf senses bring Scott to the gymnasium, where he finds the janitor’s body hanging beneath a row of bleachers.|
|Allison is like “I can’t stop my luscious body from shaking. Oh, how I wish there was a strapping young man by my side who can comfort me during my most vulnerable state!” And Stiles is like *awkward* *hands in pocket* *looks away*. Jackson, however, seizes this opportunity to hold Allison’s hands and comfort her. The two of them have been blatantly flirting with each other multiple times throughout the episode, right in front of Lydia’s stone cold bitchface! We all know where this relationship is heading, right?|
|Case in point. Here’s a detailed breakdown of their interactions so far:
Allison: *flutters eyelids*
|While Jackson is hitting on his girlfriend during this time of need, Scott is so close to retrieving the keys back at the gym…but then the bleachers start closing in on him all of a sudden!!! This is a trap! It almost seems like Scott is going to get crushed to death, but of course he escapes (and grabs the keys) just in time.|
|Lydia: Jackson, are you sure you gave me all the right acids to make the firebomb?
Jackson: Probably not. Our show doesn’t have the budget to make a realistic looking firebomb explosion, so we’re just going to pretend I made a mistake to avoid shooting the scene.
|Scott is like O YA I HAVE THIS KILLER ACID IN MY HAND, I AM INVINCIBLE so he confronts the Alpha head-on!|
|Um yeah, his so-called weapon didn’t do shit and Scott is now defenceless against his attacker. The Alpha takes a second to do this *headshake* gesture at the epic fail, before it leaps onto Scott’s body.|
|Instead of killing Scott on the spot, the Alpha appears to have other plans for our teen wolf protagonist. It starts howling rambunctiously, and the echoes ripple across the entire school.|
|This roaring triggers a pained response within Jackson, who grabs his neck and almost collapses in excruciating agony!!!|
|Jackson pretends there’s nothing wrong with *squealing* like a little bitch all of a sudden, but Stiles notices there are injury marks on his neck! WHAT’S THE DEALIO, YO?|
|Scott’s ass also has a, erm, perky reaction to the howling.|
|Fully transformed into a werewolf, Scott stalks the school hallways and traces his footsteps back to the chemistry classroom. His primal animal instincts have taken over, and he has no restraint over his instinct to *kill*!|
|Standing right outside the classroom door, ready to pounce on his friends, Werewolf Scott hears Allison’s voice just before he turns the doorknob.|
|A musical montage of Allison somehow convinces Scott that he’s still human, so he backs off and runs away before doing any damage.|
|Just then, the incompetent police officers finally arrive at the school. (I hope the asshole who answered Lydia’s call got fired.)|
|Scott and Stiles are sticking with the DEREK HALE IS THE KILLER story. Papa Stiles tells the boys that even though he trusts them, the police couldn’t find Derek’s body or the janitor’s body anywhere in the school.|
|It was the Alpha’s plan to get Scott to kill his own friends, so he can get rid of his “old pack” and join his new wolf family. The scariest part is that when Scott shifted tonight, he actually had that bloodthirsty desire to kill all of them.|
|Scott’s veterinarian boss turns out to be okay. However, disappearing at the crime scene and then reappearing at the most convenient time seems way too *suspicious*. Stiles is convinced that the shady vet is indeed the Alpha.|
|Scott tries to make amends with Allison after putting her through this whole ordeal, but she isn’t ready to forgive and forget. Even though he saved her life, Allison doesn’t feel like she could trust Scott at all. He has been keeping too many secrets from her.|
|Scott starts panicking on the spot and talks a million words per minute, hoping that something he say would convince Allison to change her mind about him.
Scott: OMG wow what a crazy night, I need to give my mom a call, speaking of telephones I am going to buy a new cell phone tomorrow morning, what model do you think I should buy, how long should I sign up a contract for, those phone companies always rip me off because they’re all greedy bastards, do you know anywhere I can download free ringtones, and oh by the way maybe I should give you a call tomorrow…
|But Allison breaks up with Scott anyway. She tells him to never ever call her again. Ouch.|
|IT’S OVAH SCOTT.|