It’s the PLL midseason premiere with some delightfully random filler! Let’s watch Aria plan her royal wedding, Mona pulls a coup and overtakes Hanna’s business, Alison and Paige have a raging feud, while Spencer sinks her claws into Toby the grieving widower.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like Spencer will be joining us for the final stretch of episodes, because this bitch is gonna be dead. There’s no way she’d survive the fatal gunshot wound from the midseason finale, right? Even if her major organs stayed intact, she must’ve slowly bled to death by now. Hey ambulance driver, turn around because we aren’t going to the hospital anymore. Let’s just save ourselves the extra trip and go directly to the morgue.
Spencer, why are you wearing a fake arm sling?
Random paramedic: Tell me your last name, Spencer! What’s your mom’s name!? Who’s your mom!?!?
WTF??? Who’s this random dude and why is he so bizarrely interested in Spencer’s mother? There’s a girl dying in front of him, but this aggressive paramedic only seems interested in harassing his victim with these personal questions. TELL ME WHO YO MOMMA IS BEFORE YOU DIE!!! Excuse me, Spencer is kinda too busy dying from her gunshot wound, so I don’t think she has time right now to draw out a family tree for you.
Mary’s whole routine is that she plops out the babies and then immediately chucks them away in the nearest disposal bin. In the animal kingdom, Mary Drake would be like a sea turtle that lays her eggs, buries them underground, and never returns to her nest ever again.
Aria: Where did Jenna go?
Hanna: Ugh. She probably walked into a closet. 😐
Heehee. Sadly for us, Jenna has gone into stealth mode after her shootout and we don’t see a lot of her character this episode, other than a delicious cameo appearance near the end. I know I should probably recap the episode in chronological order, but fuck it I love this bitch too much and can’t wait until the end to mention her. I’d also like to mention the promo for next week’s episode, which is completely Jenna-centric, and I can already tell it’s gonna be legendary. Mark my words and mark your calendar, watch the next episode because Jenna is gonna own everybody!
Just for extra emphasis: TOBY. GOT. KILLED. BY. A. FUCKING. DEER. *lmao* Okay, I know people do get killed from hitting deer IRL and I shouldn’t make light of this issue, but omg death by deer is such a Toby way to die and I hope it’s engraved in the epitaph on his tombstone.
It’s kinda like the modern day Romeo and Juliet where our two star-crossed lovers are finally reunited… Reunited on their deathbeds, that is. Even though our favourite couple couldn’t be together when they were still alive, just know Spoby will rest in peace with their souls bound forever in the afterlife! *sobs* 😭
Is there a technology in the PLL universe that allows the hospital patients to rapidly regenerate their broken body parts? They made Spencer’s gunshot wound and Toby’s car accident look so damn serious last episode, yet these were just gimmicky finale cliffhangers with no repercussions for our main characters. If a meteorite literally crashed the earth, all PLL would need to do is show a “One Week Later” time skip, where we’ll see everybody trotting along fine and dandy.
Spencer’s fake arm sling is almost like Hanna wearing a fake engagement ring after she broke up with Jordan. Both of these accessories are completely unnecessary and nobody can figure out why the girls insisted on wearing them. Soon, we’ll see Aria wearing a sombrero hat and Emily wearing Madonna’s cone bra, which will make just as much sense as the arm sling or the engagement ring.
However, the more likely scenario is there were two different gunmen operating that night. And yup, both of them were trying to kill Spencer. This poor girl is like an open field shooting range and everyone can step up to fire a shot at her. Just stand in line, wait your turn, and you’ll eventually get your chance to shoot at Spencer Hastings too.
It’s really bizarre that Toby and Yvonne were inside the exact same vehicle and in the exact same car accident, yet he’s strutting around with just a small scrape on his forehead while she’s in critical condition hanging onto the last legs of her life support. Like how does that even work? Do the airbags in Pretty Little Liars only function properly for the main characters and not for the inconsequential nobody love interests?
Excuse me! Veronica Hastings *IS* still yo momma!
If it was my child who got shot, I’d immediately jump off the cruise, swim to shore, and then board the first flight back home no matter wherever the hell I was or whatever the hell I was doing before. Evidently, Papa and Mama Hastings had other priorities in mind. I thought Mary Drake was supposed to be a bad mother, but these folks are certainly in the running for the *worst parents ever* competition.
Spencer: Uh, Alison’s husband wasn’t a real doctor. Turns out he was a crook and took all her money. Noel Kahn kidnapped Hanna. She got away. Noel Kahn is now dead. Jenna Marshall shot me. Probably. Toby and Yvonne were in a car crash. You want a glass of wine?
That was the best Previously on Pretty Little Liars segment ever. I enjoyed listening to Spencer describe all the ridiculous storylines like a news reporter speaking in short, succinct sentences. It was also great how she casually lied about Noel kidnapping Hanna, so I guess that’s the version of truth we’re sticking with now. And oh btw, yes I would like a glass of wine please, thank you very much.🍷
Spencer: She said you’re not my mother, my birth mother, that she is.
Veronica: *stunned silence*
Spencer: Okay, now would be the time to make a strong statement of denial.
Veronica: MARY DRAKE IS CLINICALLY INSANE!!!
Spencer: That’s not a denial.
Are we sure Veronica used to be a practicing lawyer because she kinda got murdered in the cross-examination by her own daughter? *DON’T LISTEN TO DAT HEFFA CUZ SHE’S CRAY* isn’t exactly in the highest calibre of thoughtful and eloquent rebuttals.
Veronica: I was sitting in this room, working. And Jessica knocked on the door. I hadn’t said five words to her since Jason was born. And there she was, like any neighbour. Come to borrow a lawnmower. Or a husband.
When Veronica first greeted her next door neighbours with “mi casa es tu casa”, Jessica must’ve interpreted the translation as “my husband is your husband”. To be fair, this could’ve worked both ways. I’m sure Jessica wouldn’t have minded if Veronica exchanged the neighbourly favour and got it on with Papa DiLaurentis as well. You cheat with my husband and I cheat with yours!
LMAOHHHHH. Peter Hastings is confirmed messy as fuck. Not only is this pussy hound clueless about which twin he’s sleeping with, but he’s also clueless about birth control. You’d think he might learn to use protection after having one bastard child, but this mofo continues spraying his sperm over every woman and their sextuplet sisters too. While it might be funny that Peter is impregnating everybody with his super fertile sperm, with great sperm comes great responsibility. If you can’t keep in yo pants, then you should have yo penis privileges taken away from you.
Veronica: Some people have a great capacity for repeating mistakes…
That’s a very diplomatic way of saying PETER HASTINGS IS A WHORE. Let’s make it clear that Spencer’s father is a total PIECE. OF. SHIT. for being unfaithful to his long-suffering wife. Seriously, I don’t understand why he’d cheat on her. Your wife is Veronica Hastings, kween of the highest order, a smart, strong, successful woman that anybody would be lucky to marry. You have this amazing catch in your life, but then you go cheat on her with those two crazy basic bitches next door!? Fuck you & fuck your awful tastes, Peter Hastings.
Ermmm… I don’t quite understand why Spencer is placing the blame on Veronica of all people. Is she angry because Veronica was compassionate enough to adopt a stray child instead of sending Spencer to the orphanage? Is she angry because Veronica overlooked her husband’s infidelity to provide a stable upbringing for her children? Or is she angry because Veronica lied about Spencer’s past to shield her from the humiliating scandal? If only Mama Hastings knew that Spencer would repay her kindness with all this BACKTALK, maybe she shouldn’t have bothered and just left that baby in the dumpster bin behind the mental asylum where she belonged.
Spencer: Yeah, but you’re not my mother!
Veronica: I am your mother! You know that!
Spencer: I don’t know anything!
Okay, can somebody slap some sense into this petulant little brat? Spencer just said one of the shittiest things you could say to your adoptive mother. Excuse me, Mama Drake may have been the one who pushed you out of her vadge, but Mama Hastings was the one who raised you for the past twenty years. In my books, Mary is just the vessel and Veronica is your real momma whether you like it or not. Finding out you were adopted doesn’t change anything. As America’s Sweetheart Simone Biles once said: “My parents are my parents and that’s it.”
Nobody will stop Ezria’s wedding! Not even you, Nicole!
In a rare moment of self-awareness, Aria knew she shouldn’t compete against Nicole for Ezra’s affections, so she quietly packed her bags and decided to leave his apartment. Good! Close the door behind you and never come back! Unfortunately, Ezra coaxed her into staying. Hey Aria, keep living here because I need a free housekeeper to tidy up while I’m gone spending all my time with Nicole in New York!
Ezra: She broke a few bones when she was abducted. They didn’t heal properly, so they have to break and reset them.
How can Aria hear what happened to Nicole and still think it’s OK for her to call dibs on Ezra? If she has one ounce of charity in her body, she’d instantly forfeit her fiancé to Nicole. This whole storyline feels like I’m watching Aria occupy a disability parking spot or steal a seat on the bus from the elderly. I don’t enjoy seeing the overprivileged take away from the underprivileged. How does Aria sleep at night trying to compete against a physically abused & emotionally traumatized victim!? Gurl, just give your concession speech and walk away with some dignity!
Hanna: Did Ezra say he wanted to postpone the wedding?
Aria: We didn’t talk about it…
Hanna: Then proceed with Plan A. Aria, you’re gonna plan this wedding and it’s gonna be waiting for him while he says goodbye to Nicole. *smugly* And trust me, he will say goodbye to her.
Hanna’s advice sounds a lot like the same strategy she used against Spencer. As long as you steamroll ahead and act like a ruthless bitch, you’ll get your man in the end. And trust me, he *will* say goodbye to her. [/Machiavellian laugh]
Seeing Holden gives me hope that we’ll see more random nobodies from the ghost of PLL’s past. I’ve a list of which minor characters should return: that bitchy girl from Mona’s French club, that cute waiter from Alison’s prom, some guy called Eddie Lamb, and who can forget Jackie, Ezra’s ex-girlfriend before there was a Nicole. I remember all of these PLL superstars!
Remember the time when Marlene King confirmed there’ll be a gay guy on PLL? Ever since then, I’ve been on the lookout sniffing for any traces of the rainbow in the new male characters they introduced. A ton of dudes came and went, and I’ve almost quit looking after chalking it up as another one of Marlene’s BS lies, until Holden burst into the scene and exclaimed effervescently, “Aria Montgomery!” And from that moment on, I knew we’ve finally found our gay unicorn.
Aria: That would be…Ezra.
Holden: No kidding! And they say high school romances don’t last.
LOL. I’m enjoying the low-key sass that Holden is serving. Obviously, he couldn’t outright insult one of his potential customers, but his backhanded compliment must’ve hit a sensitive spot for Aria and she had to smile through her cringe. However, if Aria thought Holden’s comment was cringeworthy, then just wait until she puts together her wedding guest list and realize it comprises of all the students Ezra taught in his classes. Somebody call off the high school reunion, because it’s already being held at Ezria’s wedding! I wonder if Principal Hackett gets an invite? *lolawks*
Um holy crap, did Holden just say Aria was half-price!? *lmao* Like, did I hear it wrong or did he basically just call her a cheap bitch to her face? No wonder Holden has to offer his services at half the price because this is the quality of customer service you can expect from him. Good thing Aria was dozing off and barely paying any attention to her filler storyline or else she would’ve realized she just got dissed.
Who else thinks Aria’s urgency stems from her insecurities over Nicole? The longer she holds off this wedding, the more opportunities she gives that homewrecker to strike. That’s why Aria is in such a rush to reach the altar. Getting married to Ezra is like an Olympic race and she must beat Nicole to the finish line!
LOL. Does anybody appreciate the irony of Holden asking this question? Like, here’s a total nobody asking about another fellow nobody. It’s especially funny when most of the PLL viewers are looking at this guy and asking: “Erm…who’s Holden?” I mean, I’m forced to know who Nicole is because they keep mentioning that bitch’s name every episode for the past two seasons, but who the frick is Holden!?
Meet the future fashion superstar, Hanna Marin.
It’s even more mind-boggling to know that he gave her a free apartment to live in, an apartment that she has been sexing it up with Caleb every single day and night. Just think, Lucas paid for this place, that bed, and those sheets for Haleb to fornicate on. How does he put up with this living arrangement? Is he not even a little bit jealous? Dude, you’ve been giving money to Hanna so that she and her boyfriend can spread their STDs over your residence. It’s like Lucas paid for this playboy mansion, yet Caleb is the one reaping all the sexual benefits.
Caleb: There was a time you wanted this so badly that it broke us up.
Hanna: I would never let that happen again.
Did anyone catch that moment when Caleb low-key blamed Hanna for the failure of their relationship? GURL BYE. *side eye* I wanna emphasize how Lucas offered his financial support because he believed in Hanna and wanted her to fulfill her dreams, whereas this fucking greasy loser is talking her down and disparaging her ambition. Haleb’s relationship has gotten so toxic that I pray for Hanna every night to start loving herself because girl you deserve better. ☹
Again, I feel the need to compare him to Lucas, because here’s this self-made millionaire and here’s this self-made welfare mooching rat. I continue to be amazed that Hanna is given two apples, one good and one bad, yet she insists on eating the rotten one when there’s a perfectly pristine and perfectly rich apple right next to her.
Mona: I have a scathingly brilliant idea. Do you trust me?
Hanna: *mistrustful look* …sometimes.
Mona: Make this one of those times.
Mona asking Hanna if she trusts her was supposed to be a tongue-in-cheek rhetorical question, right? I would hope the demon imp has enough self-awareness to know, gurl, that ship has sailed and sunk a long time ago.
Mona: It’s too bad about Noel! Noooo. Not really. 😀😀😀
Seeing Mona smirk with so much self-satisfaction over somebody’s brutal death only makes me love her character more. I imagine this is exactly the same way she’d react had Spoby also perished during the episode. “Oh, it’s too bad that Toby and Spencer died one after another! Noooo, not really.” And as her enemies fall down one by one in front of her, Mona Vanderwaal smiles fiendishly and claps her hands in delight.
Imagine my surprise when Hanna showed up to the meeting wearing a frumpy grey sweatshirt. Normally, she wears these extravagant ball gowns or the skimpiest cocktail dresses on any given day with no special occasion. On the one day that she needed to dazzle Chelsea Clinton about her fashion skills, Hanna decided to wear the plainest, homeliest outfit in her closet. The lack of effort was like her saying, “I don’t need to impress the client, the client needs to impress me!”
It’s a rather unconventional career, but I must admit that it’s not the worst job in the world to help famous girls find pretty dresses to wear. I might be interested in this line of work. Does anyone know if I need a political degree to apply?
Did Hanna really design this shit herself, or did she knock off a few letters from Vera Wang and try to pass off those dresses as her own? Let’s say if I look for the clothes in a PLL fashion blog, will I actually find the dresses under Hanna Marin’s name or will the truth be exposed and I find them attached to another designer’s name instead??? 😒
Hanna: Did you tell her this was your business!?!?
Mona: No. Never. It must be my natural aura of authority and knowledge.
I love how Mona managed to both lie and brag about herself in the same breath. Also, Hanna really should’ve known better than to trust the demon imp. Because whenever the devil does a favour for you, just know there’s bound to be a catch.
Gurl wut. I think Hanna was being deadly serious and genuinely believed she’s doing some important GOD’S WORK with her silly frivolous fashion designs. We have medical researchers working to cure malaria and humanitarian volunteers travelling to third-world countries to stop global famine, yet Hanna’s fashion job ranks right up there in terms of importance. Oh, look at that visionary Hanna Marin, she’s making an impact in the world with her craft and saving human lives one dress at a time!
Hanna: CALL. KATHERINE.
Oh man, did anyone notice how Hanna’s closest friends are all starting to change now that she has a million dollars? There’s Caleb mooching off her fortune, there’s Mona leeching off her success… It’s only a matter of time before the pretty little liars sniff around the bank vault too. Soon, we’ll be hearing dialogue like: “Hey Hanna, you mind covering the expenses for my wedding?” or “Hey Hanna, I’m suing you for the emotional trauma after you cheated with my boyfriend! Pay up!” All it takes is a little money in the bank and everybody’s true colours are exposed. ☹
Alison vs. Paige: WORLD WAR THREE!!!
Alison: Athletic supervisor? That’s new. *sneers* Did they invent that job just for Paige?
LOL. My thoughts exactly, although it’s a little rich coming from the unqualified teacher with the fake college diploma. Hey Alison, I don’t think you should be the one talking shit when it comes to inventing imaginary jobs for totally undeserving candidates.
Emily: Umm, I noticed you have Paige McCullers and Alison DiLaurentis on the same committee. I’m not sure that’s going to be the most productive mix…
Not only is Emily the swim coach, but she also has a second job working as the diplomatic ambassador for the two warring powers that are Alison versus Paige. Forget what’s happening between the US and North Korea, because some real nuclear shit is about to go down right here inside this staff lounge and poor, poor Emily is trying to defuse any tensions before a war erupts. Please put down your missiles, Alison! 😭 War is never the solution, Paige! 😭
As Paige extended the olive branch to her mortal nemesis, Alison snatched that branch, snapped it in half, threw it into her face, then charged forward and viciously headbutted her enemy to the ground. HAHAHA! LETTING YOUR GUARD DOWN IS A ROOKIE’S MISTAKE, PSYCHO PAIGE!!!
You might think Mrs. Horowitz is some harmless old woman unaware of the workplace politics around her, but she’s the biggest shit-stirrer in the whole frigging school. Look at this evil mastermind who pitted Alison and Paige against each other in a confined environment where they’re forced to interact. This bitch wanted conflict and she fucking got it. When the war breaks out and the death toll begins to rise, just know there is blood on your hands, Horowitz!!!
At the start of the committee meeting, Paige said a few words before Alison interjected with some veiled sarcasm, “I just wanted to say how great that Paige is taking the lead!” Paige was taken by surprise and feeling a little cautious, but she thanked her for the compliment. At this point, Emily was still oblivious and even smiling because her two girls were getting along. She hadn’t detected that tone, those words, or the steely determination in Ali’s eyes. Alison concealed her hostility so tactfully that nobody knew she launched the first strike against Paige. Her missile was already flying dangerously in mid-air and everyone was still looking at ground level, y’know?
Paige: It’s not that big a deal…
Alison: Oh, don’t be modest. Some of us remember what you used to be like. Don’t we, Emily?
I love watching Emily’s expression darken when it finally dawned upon her that Alison is attacking Paige, but it’s too late for any of them to evacuate. OH NO, THE MISSILE IS GONNA DETONATE BUT THE BOMB SHELTER IS TOO FAR AWAY!!! LORD HAVE MERCY, WE’RE ALL GONNA GET HIT!!!
BOOM. And just like that, we all died from Alison’s stealthy bitch attack. I was left critically injured because Ali is such a humungous bitch that even innocent spectators are struck by the shockwaves of her intense bitchiness. The scariest part is that she’s only getting warmed up. Once Alison launched her initial ambush, she’s just gonna continue and keep firing all these shots at Paige. I hope you recovered from the first strike, because Alison is about to fly her bomber jets and drop a dozen more bombs your way!
Alison: Yeah, but it was more than that. Right, Emily?
It’s not enough for Alison to lash out at Paige and belittle her for no reason, but she also seeks reinforcements to back up her bitchiness. She kept asking for validation from Emily and even Mrs. Horowitz (ohhh, I bet that bitch is loving all this drama, isn’t she? 😎) as a blatant attempt to turn them against Paige. There’s strength in numbers and Alison is trying to recruit as many allies as she could in the battlefield. Her mean girl tactics are so fucking ruthless that even Sun Tzu is rolling in his grave because he knows he can’t compete with the great war commander, Alison DiLaurentis.
Paige: I bet Mrs. Horowitz remembered you too, Alison. You’re pretty unforgettable.
Alison: Thank you.
Paige: It wasn’t a compliment.
What started out as a boring school committee meeting escalated into an epic bitchfight with Alison and Paige exchanging hilarious verbal blows at each other. When the news spreads around school about what transpired between these two bitches, everyone is gonna be begging to join Mrs. Horowitz’s committee because they all want front row seats to the next MMA cagefight.
Alison: Sure, if Paige thinks she needs a break. I understand her feeling a little overwhelmed.
Emily: STAHP IT!!!! 😠
During the fight, Emily remained completely silent and didn’t wanna pick a side, but Alison was behaving like such a supreme bitch that her most loyal lapdog can’t pretend to stay neutral anymore. SHUT UR WHORE MOUTH, ALISON! WE GET IT, YOU HATE PAIGE, NOW ENUFF IS ENUFF! Alison just batted her eyelashes and looked innocent in response. She hasn’t even touched her best material yet, but I guess she’ll save all the *PIGSKIN!!!* insults for another episode instead.
Bullying Paige wasn’t a cute look during Alison’s teenage years, but it looks even less cute when they’re both supposed to be adults. On one hand, I enjoy Alison when she behaves like a raging bitch, because that girl has a honed craft and her shit is glorious to watch. On the other hand, I’m disappointed because I thought her character experienced personal growth. The past few seasons have been one long hypothesis proving Alison *is* capable of empathy, and just when we were so close to declaring she has a soul, this bitch undid all her years of goodwill with one scene proving she never changed. Gurl, I was rooting for you, we were all rooting for you! 😭
Alison: Please. *makes a face* Just go away.
Emily: That’s what you want me to do. God, Ali, why do we have to keep showing you we love you?
Emily was all over the place, telling Alison that she hated her in one moment and then professing her eternal love right afterwards. See, this is the part of you that I HATE: *points to Alison’s heart… or where it’s supposed to be if she actually had one* But see, this is the part of you that I LOVE: *points to Alison’s fanny* The problem is that Emily hates Alison’s personality parts, but loves the rest of her lady parts, which makes it tough to lust after her without being reminded of what a horrible person she is.
Alison: I don’t know…
Emily: Please don’t kiss me again. *pauses* Not until you know.
I love how Emily made such a bold statement about never kissing Alison again, but then realized she’s screwing over herself with this arrangement, so she quickly backtracked and threw in a disclaimer to cover her bases. You can’t kiss me again, not until it’s a birthday, a holiday, an anniversary, a weekend, a weekday, or a weeknight!
“Spoby gotta be endgame, bitches.” – A.D.
Emily: It wants us to play…
Hanna: No, Em. It wants to play with us.
Unfortunately, A created such an awesome kickass board game but the liars are too freaked out to even touch the pieces. What’s wrong with you girls!? This looks like so much fun! Let’s all grab a bowl of popcorn, turn on some music, and call it a board game night!
Am I the only one who thinks the board game might be sentient??? Like R2D2 except trapped in the body of an evil psychotic board game. Holy hell, I remember the good old days when board games only required you to move the pieces up the ladder or down the chute, but why is A’s game so damn futuristic and complex!?
Spencer: Fin de partie… Endgame. It means there’re only a few pieces left to play and it’s all over.
ARRÊT! Okay, Spencer Hastings needs an intervention. I’ve let it slide by a couple of times in the past, but I’ve had it with this bitch and her unusual tendency to go Francophone all of a sudden. Girl, what’s your deal? Why do you parle en français at random times? It used to be that Spencer would only speak French when she’s trying to flirt with Toby, but now this bitch has gotten outta control and she’s just leaking out words in a different language for no reason. Is there a faulty translation microchip inside Spencer’s robotic mind or something? Je ne comprends pas toi!
Truth or dare, fine, whatever, I’ll go along with it. At least this game has potential to get juicy, or so I thought until I saw Spencer’s first dare: “Visit Toby.” OK WHAT IS THIS CRAP. I thought A’s whole purpose is to torture the pretty little liars and make them as miserable as possible!? I didn’t have A.D. pegged as a hardcore Spoby shipper trying to set them up together. WTF I DIDN’T ASK FOR THIS MATCHMAKING SHITE. THIS GAME SUX.
The only memorable moment was when Toby put on his glasses and looked cute as hell. He has a bit of that *shy guy studying in the campus library* kind of look, which I likey-likey. Long-time readers will be familiar with Recap Everything’s weird glasses fetish, so I will admit in my safe space that Toby + 👓 = YAS I WOULD. And judging by the way Spencer is staring at him, evidently she would too.
Just look at the two of them. Spencer and Toby aren’t being particularly subtle with their flirting. He’s caressing her back, copping a feel, and completely forgetting that his unconscious fiancée is on life support. It makes me wonder why we’re even going through this charade. Why wait for Yvonne to die, or wake up from her coma, or get murdered by Spencer with a pillow? Dead or alive, let’s just put that bitch in a body bag, shove her into a morgue somewhere, and let Spoby be together again. Happy ending for everyone! ☺
Mary: I’m sorry that you’ll be a baby born in a madhouse, like a mysterious orphan in an old book. A book filled with calamity and misfortune, but perhaps a happy ending.
Yeah, it’s a nice letter, but this one letter isn’t gonna offset all the grotesque things that Mary Drake has done in the past. Am I supposed to feel sorry for this bitch? CUZ I DON’T.
Why is Veronica trying so hard to be a good parent? Is it because she loves Spencer, or is it because she just wanna save face? Imagine how bad you oughta look if your child prefers Mary Drake as her real mother over you. *lol gurl* What Spencer should do is: ask Veronica to pen a letter to her as well, describing in 300 words or less about why she deserves to be her mom. Whoever writes the winning letter will get to become Spencer’s FINAL MOTHA.
Unfortunately, this board game is a sacred artefact and cannot be destroyed because it’s the only plot device in Season 7B. The PLL writers can’t come up with any more storylines for their dying show, so they’re hedging all their bets on this board game to carry the entire season. We won’t let you destroy our precious game, Hanna! Or else we’ll have no story left for the next nine episodes!
This time, it’s the footage of the pretty little liars digging up Archer’s body, although A could’ve easily used all the other footage in existence. One must wonder why A even bothered recording these new videos when there’re so many old videos to choose from. A already has enough incriminating footage of the liars to start their own Netflix library, y’know?