Season 6 Episode 13, Pretty Little Liars Recap, The Gloves Are On

Season 6 Episode 13, Pretty Little Liars Recap
Season 6 Episode 13, Pretty Little Liars Recap
Season 6 Episode 13, Pretty Little Liars Recap
Pretty Little Liars Recap Season 6 Episode 13
Episode Highlights:

ARE YOU READY FOR SPALEB SEX??? Their hilariously pornographic love saga continues. Also: Ezra has a LOLPSYCHO meltdown, Lucas is now a rich nerd, and Emily is selling her scrambled eggs.

Episode Grade: A+ (Epic!)
The episode begins with the pretty little liars wearing fluffy white robes and big cucumber slices over their eyes.

This will not end well for you, Hanna Marin.
The pretty little liars are bitching about Ezra and Aria, which is arguably a pretty relaxing activity.
Spencer was hating on Ezra and Aria so much so fast during this scene. It was GLORIOUS.
Spencer and Emily's cucumber slices fall off when they find out that Hanna deleted all of the security footage around the time of Charlotte's murder.
Why is Hanna such a dumb bitch every single time!?!?
Ashley has to resort to her old tricks in order to clear her daughter's name from this crime.
Lorenzo looks exactly like Scooby Doo.
Hanna continues to lie to her mom even though her stupid lie got her into trouble with the police.
Sara Harvey is like a cancer cell.
How does Sara have so much free time to stalk Emily and follow her everywhere she goes???
Sara Harvey is basically like a cancer cell. She exists solely to scare you and be evil.
Emily's mom is sooooo annoying and it's no wonder Emily can't spend three seconds with her mother before making a prompt exit.
Pam actually believes that Emily wants to get into a grad school when she didn't even graduate college.
Pam reads Emily's mail and finds out that her daughter actually dropped out of school, lolwhoops!
Pam confronts her daughter over being a lying college dropout.
Sara is now stalking Emily from a bench. Of course she would be there in her wannabe biker get-up.
Emily donned on a Halloween costume from Shana's costume shop in order to take her graduation photo.
Why isn't Pam upset that her daughter lied to her for four years about dropping out of college?
Emily and Pam promise to tell each other all their secrets from now on. *awks*
Emily bitches out Sara Harvey for being a stalker bitch once again.
Am I supposed to feel bad that Sara can't use her hands? BECAUSE I DON'T.
Sara burned her hands on some electrical wires during the confrontation at Radley
Sara Harvey electrocuted herself! Stop passing the buck!
Can Emily punch Sara in the face again? Pretty please?

Move over, Shakespeare. Ezra is better than you.
The famous Pigtunia makes a cameo appearance once again!
Liam is only on Pretty Little Liars to provide Aria and the viewers with updates on Ezra's book.
Liam's webcam striptease was awkward as hell to watch.
Liam, just wanted to let you know that you're stripping for a public audience. Carry on.
How can Aria tell a bold-faced lie about missing Liam when she already slept with Ezra?
Aria spends all of her time with Ezra instead of Liam anyway. Why are they still dating?
I know in my heart of hearts that Ezra is a terrible crappy writer no matter how much Aria tries to convince us otherwise.
Aria leaves over-the-top biased reviews about Ezra's crappy unfinished book.
Aria describes Ezra as compassionate, sensitive, and kind. Those are not the three words I would've used.
Emily can't appreciate the classic masterpiece written by the greatest writer of our time, Ezra Fitz.
Aria rips into Emily when she offers a second opinion on Ezra's writing.
Aria refuses to listen any time someone criticizes how creepy it is that she has a relationship with her high school teacher.
Aria's boss calls Ezra a fraud and says he's two months away from teaching creative writing on a cruise ship.
Ezra says his collection of necrophilic images are for research. Erm, okay.
Ezra has a LOLPSYCHO meltdown.
Ezra broke a chair at the hotel like a frigging psycho.
A picture of Aria's angry angelfish face says a thousand words.
Aria is willing to lie and cover-up for murderer just to protect her beloved Ezra!
Aria's hilariously animated facial expressions crack my shit up.
The Anti-Ezra Brigade has finally assembled in front of his doorstep!
I wish the pretty little liars actually made some sense when they were attacking Ezra for all the shit he didn't do.
Spencer is so frigging obsessed with her criminology crime and she's desperate to tie it to the murder investigation.
Ezra fucking snapped and yelled at the girls to GET THE FUCK OUT!!!
Ironically, Ezra wasn't considered a real suspect in Charlotte's murder until he had that LOLPSYCHO meltdown, and now yeah definitely suspect number one.
Aria is ghostwriting Ezra's book for him. I'm not looking forward to this storyline at all.
Lucas is richer and nerdier than ever.
Lucas is now a filthy rich gaming mogul and self-made millionaire five years later.
Lucas definitely has Hanna's attention now that he is so rich.
Hanna asks Lucas, a self-proclaimed millionaire, if he still lives with mommy and daddy.
Lucas lives alone in his apartment loft with his dead hamster.
Hanna wants Lucas to lie about spending a night at the hotel to provide her with an alibi.
Lucas is willing to lie to the police and cover up for his high school crush Hanna.

Who wants to buy Emily’s eggs?
Hanna is eating frozen orange juice concentrate with a spoon.
Why didn't Emily close the bathroom door when she was taking her needle injections?
Hey Emily, I saw you in the bathroom! Erm, did I just admit that out loud?
Emily's big dark unspeakable secret in Season 6 is that she's selling her eggs!
Emily believes she's doing a good deed by donating her eggs to families in need.
What was Pretty Little Liars thinking when they turned Emily's eggs into an ongoing plot this season?
I’ll be your sugar daddy, Hanna!
The police doesn't believe that Lucas would be able to spend a night with Hanna in the hotel room.
Lucas can't get any action with Hanna even in a fake police testimony.
Hanna thinks it's socially acceptable to strut around in public wearing her kimono night robe.
Holy shit, did Lucas just give away one of his apartments to Hanna?
Lucas will definitely be spying on Hanna in her new apartment.
Hanna just grabbed the apartment keys without hesitation. Free stuff, yay!
Lucas just lied to the police, gifted away a free apartment, and now he's cooking dinner, but Hanna still won't give him the time of day.
RAW, NASTY, STEAMING HOT SPALEB SEX!!!
Okay, nobody cares about Damian the scumbag journalist or whoever.
Melissa delivers an epic line, Cause I know how you like to shop out of other people's carts. LMAO.
Hanna is so obviously not over Caleb. Why is she giving him away to Spencer?
 Spencer really respected her friend's feelings and didn't make a move on Caleb until Hanna gave permission.
SPALEB is good to go! Hanna gave affirmation over this relationship! Go ahead and take my boyfriend!
The more PLL fans hate Spaleb, the more I love them together.
Caleb pretends to read a book to impress Spencer.
OMFG. SPALEB IS COMING.
The Spaleb sex scene was shot in such a dark, eerie way.
Spaleb sex almost feels satanic?
Read more recaps!

12 Responses

  1. Default avatar Anonymous June 19th, 2016 / Sunday

    Keep up the great recaps, RE! I’ve been a fan of yours for a while now and it’s so good to see that your recaps get funnier and funnier <3

    • Default avatar Recap Everything June 19th, 2016 / Sunday

      THANK YOU FOR THE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. It’s always so nice to hear from a longtime reader who still stood by me through heavy rain and thunderous storms. <3 <3 <3

  2. Default avatar Julia June 21st, 2016 / Tuesday

    You’re back!!!!!!!!
    I loved the Spaleb sex! Spaleb are hilarious. And Spencer did everything right. I still maintain that Hanna doesn’t get to call eternal dibs on Caleb even though she is engaged to marry someone else.

    Oh, and I really don’t think Lorenzo of all people should be in charge of the sexual predator unit. The only person less suitable for that job would be Ezra.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything June 22nd, 2016 / Wednesday

      SPALEB cracks me up, they feel ~so wrong~ yet ~so right~. Spencer really did do everything right in this scenario, but if only Hanna had shown her the same courtesy before stealing her boyfriend back.

      Dat awkward moment when Lorenzo goes through the sexual offenders list only to realize that he himself is on it.

  3. Default avatar RE ADDICT June 21st, 2016 / Tuesday

    I’m so glad you’re back for season 7!! Hopefully it’ll be better than season 6. But your recaps keep getting better, no matter how good or bad PLL is! Aria and Ezra were both hilarious and terrible together this season! I’m looking forward to your opinion on Aria getting ordained, and her weird vision/reanctment of Ezra and Nicole’s break up. (Nicole is totally coming back either tonight in the premiere or in the summer finale, right??!!) I don’t agree with you about Spaleb though, but not because I’m an angry Haleb shipper. I just think that Caleb kind of ruins Spencer’s character, and we haven’t gotten to see her usual insanity and humor. Normally, Spencer is accusing everyone of murder and making inappropriate jokes. But this season, she’s just wearing a ton of lingerie and acting like a clingy girlfriend. I want to see our STRONG INDEPENDENT SPENCER!! But her character wasn’t the only problem with 6B- I think the time jump was just too rushed, and should have started either at the beginning of season 6 or 7 so the writers had more time to plan it. Because I’m even more angry about Alison’s character, who used to be an amazing badass bitch, but now she’s just being used as a plot device :(

    • Default avatar Julia June 23rd, 2016 / Thursday

      The recaps definitely keep getting better! I guess I’m actually hoping for the show to get worse so the recaps can be even more hilarious. Is that wrong?

    • Default avatar Recap Everything June 25th, 2016 / Saturday

      Yes, I’m back for Season 7~~~ *party balloon*

      My theory about Season 6 is that the pretty little liars should’ve just stayed in the dollhouse ALL SEASON LONG. Imagine if they did the five year time skip in the middle of the season and these girls are STILL in the dollhouse. That would’ve been epic and probably leagues better than what Season 6 ended up being.

      EZRIA is so hilariously terrible together and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry about their collaborative fanfiction. I don’t think Nicole is even *important* enough to return in a premiere or a finale episode lol. She’ll probably come back in some random episode before, do a little bit of homewrecking, let Aria revel in her favourite Ezria drama for a few episodes, before disappearing from the show forever again.

      OMG, Spencer’s lingerie during her Spaleb scenes is truly ~inspired~ lol. I’m already over Spaleb by the end of this season and is ready for either Caleb/Ashley or Caleb/Mona to take place in Season 7.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything June 25th, 2016 / Saturday

      I usually have the most material in my recaps when an episode is either REALLY good (which is admittedly rare) or REALLY bad, so either way works for me lol~

  4. Default avatar Super Creepy Stalker Ezra June 27th, 2016 / Monday

    Yaaaaay, you’re back!!! I’m glad I read this recap AFTER I saw sneak peak from 7×02. I don’t wanna spoil anything so I’ll just say Aria’s words about Ezra’s book about how the world will see the REAL him is so much funnier now.

    I’m so glad you’re doing recaps again. I felt like Chandler when he had cigarette after years of not smoking lol. I literally read the most recent recaps (7×01, 6×12 and 6×13) at 1AM, drinking energy drink to make sure my brain will enjoy every single word of them lol. I’m such and RE junkie…

    • Default avatar Recap Everything June 29th, 2016 / Wednesday

      YAYYYYY!!! I just finished watching 7×02 and I gotta say Liam’s smackdown of Ezra is truly INSPIRED. What a hero.

      If there’s any consolation, I pull multiple all-nighters whenever I work on these monstrous recaps, so I was probably also awake with an energy drink while you were binge-reading late at night. <3

  5. Custom avatar Anonymous March 13th, 2017 / Monday

    Can I just say, your cucumber drawing skills are on point.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything March 16th, 2017 / Thursday

      Thank you! Finally, I get some recognition as a cucumber artist! Make sure you check out my upcoming art exhibition, coming to a salad bar near you.

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