Season 3 Episode 21, Pretty Little Liars Recap, Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Toby is dead dead dead; Detective Wilden is also dead dead dead; but unfortunately, Ezria’s relationship is still not dead dead dead.

In this episode, the other liars finally find out that Toby is the betrAyer.

ARIA’S REACTION: As expected, Aria was hilariously obtuse when she reiterated lines like “Toby secretly hated you!? And the whole time you were together, he was just pretending!?” Okay there, why don’t you rub a little more salt onto that wound?

EMILY’S REACTION: As the President of Toby’s fan club, Emily was adorably loyal to her friend until the bitter end. She’s deep in denial and keeps insisting that: “We all know how much Toby loves you! This can’t be true! There has to be more to the story!” (omglol she sounds like a diehard Spoby fan during the dark ages~ I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP UNTIL IT SINKS, CAPTAIN!!!)

HANNA’S REACTION: Hanna was too preoccupied with her mother’s criminal record to deal with Toby’s bullshit, but she had the nerve to suggest that he is maybeperhapspossibly evil, which enraged Emily as she immediately jumps to defend Toby’s honour.

Hanna: The more I think about it, the more I think we should stop searching for him. Spencer is right, Toby is dangerous…

Aww, I actually think it’s so ~*admirable*~ of Emily to stand by her friend and refuse to believe the worst in him. After three seasons, Emily x Toby still have one of the sweetest and purest friendships on the show. They are the best ship in PLL, forever and always. :)

With that said, it’s hilarious to watch how much Emily puts Toby on a pedestal, holy lol. She really does think he is the best thing since sliced bread.

Emily: The Toby I know would never do anything to hurt any of us. :) He is simply the best. :)
Spencer: um he just tried to kill me in the sauna 10 mins ago
Emily: I won’t believe Toby is evil until I see him in a dark hoodie, sharpening a machete, and holding your severed head on a stick. And even then, I still have my doubts.

Emily is concerned that something bad happened to Toby since he has been missing for the past couple of weeks. His family is also nowhere to be found.

Emily: Are you sure there’s nothing you can do?
Pam: Honey, I’m sure if Toby was really missing, his family would have filed a report by now.

Imagine if a civilian has been missing for over a month, only to be told by the police that he isn’t “really missing” as they continue to do nothing about it. Emily’s mother must be thinking: “Wow, filing a missing persons report sounds like A LOT of paperwork. Maybe if I ignore the problem long enough, it’ll stop bothering me and I won’t have to do any actual police work? :D”

Emily: I’m worried! I don’t think he took his break-up with Spencer very well.

Oh yes, most guys around Toby’s age are *so devastated* and *so heartbroken* after dumping their teenage girlfriends. I’m sure he must be weeping into his little pink diary instead of blazing through a trail of hot sluts right about now.

Pam: I wish you would just let this go! I don’t trust Toby. I haven’t since he caused that fire.

I love it whenever Pam gets into her *judgmental parent* mode. Goodness knows what she must have said back when Maya was missing last season. “Emily, I wish you would just let this go! I never trusted Maya, and quite frankly, I won’t be surprised if she ended up in a ditch somewhere.” *judgey face*”

Emily: Mom, can I use your work computer to assess confidential and highly sensitive data in the police database system? Erm, I mean, I wanna check my e-mail?
Pam: Sure! Just like a public library, the computers at the police precinct are free for personal use. ^_^

Oh my god, please keep on NOT abiding any of the police protocol, Detective Fields! I’m sure Pam uses her work computer all the time to check her personal e-mail, social media accounts, celebrity news stories, shopping sites, and maybe even look up a few online recipes as she contemplates what to cook for dinner that night.

Emily wants to investigate Toby’s pseudonym “E. Lamb”. However, the Rosewood police must have the slowest and most inefficient computer system on the face of the earth, because it takes ~*forever never*~ for the database to load. Naturally, the 3600px high-resolution photograph of E. Lamb loads very, very, very slowly from bottom to top. The picture still hasn’t finished loading by the end of the episode, so we never find out what this dude’s face looks like.

OMG. Have the police considered a technological upgrade? No wonder they haven’t solved Alison’s murder yet, their database must still be stuck on the loading screen for the past three seasons.

Spencer wants Emily to stop her investigation on Toby, because it’s embarrassing for her that they made the same amount of progress, except Emily didn’t have to waste hundreds of dollars to hire a private detective. Remember when Spencer paid a grand just to have some dude tell her that Toby used his credit card to buy hydrangeas? *lol*

Spencer is also concerned that Emily might be in life-threatening danger because Mona gave her the ~*evil eye*~ earlier in the episode. (Apparently, Mona can’t look at anyone without having some sort of sinister intention. That’s one of the perks for being a certified crazypants.) As such, Spencer makes her friend pinky-swear promise that she won’t investigate Toby’s whereabouts anymore… SPOILER ALERT: Guess what Emily spends the rest of the episode doing!

Spencer becomes extremely worried about Emily’s safety after A sends her a funeral wreath with a message that says: “With Deepest Sympathies”. Spencer thinks there’s a cryptic message where the letters ‘E’ and ‘M’ are ~*glowing*~ unlike the rest of the letters, which apparently signifies Emily’s life is in grave danger!!!

Holy farfetched conspiracy theories, Batman! It’s hilarious considering The A Team has never been that subtle with their death threats. Most of the time, their messages to the pretty little liars tend to be along the lines of: “I’ll be waiting for you in the backyard with a butcher’s knife at 7:15PM tonight. –A”, so I’m not sure why Spencer is suddenly freaking out just because the light reflects off some of the letters from a certain angle.

Mona and Spencer had a brief showdown at the coffee shop where they exchanged a bunch of passive aggressive remarks about orchids. But after watching Spencer jump on Mona and choke the bejesus out of her, all of their non-choking interactions just seem to pale in comparison.

Spencer: I want to thank you for the flowers. The orchids are especially beautiful. ;O
Mona: Make sure not to leave them in direct sunlight. I did once. They didn’t make it through the night. ;O

I know the transcript reads like what Homemaker #1 would say to Homemaker #2 during their monthly gardening club meeting, but the atmosphere was actually ~*crazy tense*~ between them.

Later in the episode, we see Mona sitting on the couch countin’ her dollar bills. It was not explained why she’s carrying so much cash in her purse (of course we don’t find out why), but I’m assuming it must have been a busy night at the strip club, eh? Mona was also talking on the phone with a mystery someone (of course we don’t find out who) where they agreed to meet at a mystery location (of course we don’t find out where). She could have been chatting to Red Coat, or maybe she was just confirming an afternoon appointment with her hairdresser. I GUESS WE WILL NEVER KNOW.

Spencer is hot on her trail as she spies on Mona and follows her around. I use the term ‘spying’ very loosely since Spencer was practically two paces away from her. She could reach her arm out and pretty much tap Mona on the shoulder. So yeah, Spencer might want to work on her tailing skills next time she’s trying to *discretely* follow somebody. She ain’t doing it right! :|

In the past few weeks, Spencer must have hired a detective, visited a psychic, prayed to God, and performed every trick in the book to bring Toby back to her, but not once did he respond back. However, he quickly got in touch with Emily and arranged to meet with her as soon as she started looking for him. Ooh, that has gotta sting a little, doesn’t it Spencer? It sure showed where his true loyalties lie.

Granted, this feels like one big -A hoax and Mona was probably the one sending those misleading text messages to Emily just for fun.

In the end, Toby was a no-show. Emily decides to head home after the two-hour mark, so I guess 135 minutes is exactly how much Toby’s friendship means to Emily. “Oh, I’m gonna find him no matter what!” *and then gives up two hours later* That’s a pretty weak effort, bro. If she was really concerned about her friend, she would have waited for seven days and seven nights! Or at least until midnight.

And then this happened:

Red Coat: oh hai *random cameo*
Emily: OMG!!!
Red Coat: oh bai *vanishes into thin air*
Emily: :*(

Although Emily couldn’t find Red Coat, she does run into one of Toby’s coworkers at the warehouse. This guy says to her, “Look… No Toby. No girl in the red coat. And no unicorns either.” Heh, someone is a little snarky. At the rate we’re going though, we prolly have a higher chance of seeing a unicorn on the show before finding out whoever the hell this Red Coat person is.

Strangely enough, this complete nobody knows Emily’s name even though she never introduced herself to him. He was like *lolwhoops* and *I am psychic* and *We may have met when I was in another life* but Emily doesn’t believe him and she starts freaking out. AND THEN TOBY RIPS OFF HIS SKIN MASK AND REVEALS IT WAS HIM ALL ALONG!!!!!

Naw, just kidding! It’s still just some random dude. My theory is that he’s probably some low-level recruit for The A Team, but I’m not gonna get too worked up over whoever he is. Besides, his character will probably never appear on the show again, and I doubt the pressing question on everyone’s minds is “OMG we must find out who Emily was talking to in the warehouse???” Just mark this one down as another loose end that won’t ever get resolved.

By now, you probably realize this investigation went nowhere, nothing got accomplished, and it has been a colossal waste of time for both Emily and the viewers. I guess the most exciting thing to happen was A leaving behind a message for Emily: “Toby is no more. –A” In a total dick move, A also smashes Emily’s car window, causing her hundreds of dollars in auto repair. Aww man, why you gotta be like that, A? Why couldn’t you just leave the message on the windshield or send her a text???

P.S. First the tires, and now the windows. Emily’s car may have been victimized by A more often than Aria does.

A sends a lot of merchandise to Emily strongly indicating that Toby is dead dead dead. I guess that text message from Toby was supposed to say “Stop looking. I’ll meet you…IN HELL.” Since A is being ~*so heavy-handed*~ with the clues, there’s something very suspicious about his alleged death, aka. he’s not rly dead. Nonetheless, any time there’s a proclaimed dead character on the show, you know what that means. It’s time for another ~*death haiku*~ brought to you by Recap Everything.

A Funeral Eulogy – In Loving Memory of Toby Cavanaugh
What I will miss most
Drooling over that six pack
That’s pretty much it

Spencer also thinks Toby is dead dead dead after she follows Mona into the woods and finds his lifeless corpse lying there on the ground. If you had doubts that his death is a total hoax, allow me to point out a few obvious clues that indicate he actually lives lives lives.

1.) THEY NEVER SHOWED HIS FACE! I know there was a bloody hand and that damn tattoo, which may give you some pause, but the fact that they refused to give us *TOBYDEADFACE* is kind of a giveaway. Do you really think they’d kill off a primary character and not give us the money shot? Puh-leeze. For all we know, Toby might be taking a nap right now and simply forgot to wash the barbeque sauce off his hands. NO FACE = NO CONCLUSIVE EVIDENCE = NO DEATH!!! :O

2.) Also, how convenient is it that Toby just happens to die on top of a cozy blanket sheet? O RLY? We’re supposed to believe the killer was so considerate to murder him in a comfortable location where he won’t get any leaves and twigs on his body. Puh-leeze. Toby must have thought: “If I have to pull an all-nighter in these woods, I wanna make myself as comfortable as possible!”

One of the funniest moments in the episode happened right after Spencer found Toby’s body. All of a sudden, we hear Mona’s voice loudly and dramatically proclaiming: “HE’S DEAD!” And then she dashes out of her hiding place from behind a bush and scurries away like a panicked little rodent. *lmao* That was so completely random. Has she been hiding there for this entire time just to make that announcement? Mona is such a troll.

Once again, Spencer loses her shit for the bajillioneth time where she starts crying and sobbing and panting and hyperventilating like crazy. I know it seems like this mentally unstable bitch has a psychotic episode every ten minutes, but each of her breakdowns always feels more ~*epic*~ than the previous one. I, for one, will never grow tired of watching Spencer unfold and unwind in so many different shades of cray.

MEET MALCOLM 2.0!!! Wait, does Ezra know that’s not his real son? O_O He might want to get a paternity test checked out. I don’t know how many other kids that slutbag Maggie has stashed at her house, but last time I checked, this isn’t the same Malcolm that was introduced to us earlier in the season! I guess Maggie must have gone to the children making factory and traded her original son for a newer upgraded model.

CONSPIRACY THEORY: What if Maggie just kidnapped some random kid from her classroom and pretended he was Malcolm so that she can shield her ~*real*~ son from Ezra’s monstrosity? :O

Aria: Hey babe!
Malcolm: Hello!
Aria: I just called a seven-year-old babe. O_O

Wow, look at Aria taking age-inappropriate relationships TO THE NEXT LEVEL!!! I know she gets off on taboo romances, but isn’t Malcolm a little too young for her tastes!? Not to mention, she hasn’t even rinsed her hands clean from the little brother yet, and now she already moved on to the seven-year-old son!? Damn, she must be really desperate to sink her claws into their family fortune! Any Fitzgerald blood relative will do, huh?

Malcolm: Hi Aria, will you be my new mommy? ^_^
Aria: I…I should go. *ARIA EYES O_O*

It’s very telling that Aria’s first instinct upon meeting New Malcolm is to bolt for the door and run for the hills. RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN GIRL!

Aria: I can’t imagine Maggie would be too happy about this.
Ezra: Aria, Maggie knows *exactly* who you are in my life. Believe me, she’s perfectly fine with you being here.

Of course Maggie would be fine with it. It’s not like she has any moral compass herself. This is the woman who accepted seven years of bribery to keep her son away from his biological father, so she isn’t in a position to question anybody’s *life choices*.

Aria was forced to play with Malcolm and his train set, which cracks me up because I’m immediately reminded of what a very wise woman once said during the Halloween episode.

Jenna: Aria has a thing for authority figures, so she’s probably shacking up with the train conductor. ;D

PRAISE PROPHET JENNA MARSHALL! She has Aria completely pegged to a tee.

Suddenly, Maggie waltz into the apartment (of course she would have a set of his keys, lol Aria you’re screwed) and Ezra’s first reaction was: “Let me take Malcolm elsewhere so my former teenage girlfriend would be alone in a room with my current teenage girlfriend. AWKWARDSIES. ^_^”

Things are made even more awkward when Aria starts apologizing profusely to Maggie: “OH MY GOD MAGGIE I AM SO SORRY I PROMISED I WOULDN’T TELL EZRA ABOUT HIS SON IT’S NOT MY FAULT I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO YOU!!! O_O” and Maggie was like *lolkay* and *totally over it*. Leave it to Aria to dig up some long forgotten storyline and make a big stink over it. Move on already, Aria. No1curr. -_-”

I think Aria actually feels ashamed to tell her family about the Maggie and Malcolm situation, but from the way she was behaving like a conspicuous little squirrel, Mama Montgomery suspects something is bothering her daughter. Aria stumbles over her lies yet pretends everything is *cool beans*, so her mother offers her some very wise advice instead.

Ella: Aria, you forgot your balls.

Taken completely out of context, but it’s still true. ^_^ If Aria had any backbone, she would not put up with being the stepmother to her boyfriend’s son bullshit. Girl, pick up your balls and leave him already!

Aria volunteers to look after Malcolm because Ezra and Maggie are too busy being adults with actual responsibilities in their lives. So basically, Aria has been reduced to a glorified babysitter in the relationship. *lolsosad* When Ezra said that he will find a way to include Aria into his life, I’m not sure this babysitting gig is what she had in mind? Like, what’s the difference between Aria and a nanny? Oh wait, at least nannies get paid for their services.

As it turns out, Aria couldn’t even do her one and only job properly, because under her supervision, Malcolm falls off the bed, scrapes his chin, and has to be hospitalized due to the injury. To be fair, she had her back turned for two seconds and then this little bugger immediately starts jumping on the bed like a frigging trampoline, so it kinda serves him right for falling on his ass. Yes, only on Recap Everything do we celebrate the bodily harm of a seven-year-old child, BUT HE FELL OFF THE BED WHAT AN IDIOT HAHAHAHAHA. *points finger and laughs mockingly*

At the hospital, Ezra tells an extremely apologetic Aria that he doesn’t blame her for what happened, but then proceeds to interrogate her with passive aggressive questions like “You were talking on the phone with Spencer when Malcolm got hurt???” and “You weren’t watching over my son for the whole time???”

Would you leave your child under Aria’s care??? Come on, that girl is like a walking safety hazard herself. I’m surprised one of her gigantic jewellery pieces didn’t pierce Malcolm through his flesh. It could have been a lot worse, so Ezra should consider himself VERY LUCKY that his son made it to the hospital in one piece.

Aria: I should be banned from ever being around kids.

You know who else should be banned from ever being around kids? I’m not even going to answer that rhetorical question. These jokes just write themselves.

Don’t feel too bad about almost killing him, Aria. I’m sure the next time his character appears on the show, he will be replaced by an entirely different child actor. If this one gets a few scratches and bruises, you can always trade him in for a brand new Malcolm 3.0!

Look at Malcolm giving Aria the stink eye after the accident, lmao. He must be thinking: “Oh my god, I was only with her for one afternoon and I almost lost a chin. Goodness knows what else would happen if I was left unsupervised with her for any longer. DADDY, I DON’T LIKE THIS LADY, PLEASE FIND ME A NEW NANNY~”

A cynical part of me believes that Aria secretly wanted this to happen so that she could eliminate her biggest threat to Ezra’s heart. Less Malcolm means more Ezra for Aria! This is all part of her ~*master plan*~!

The MVP of the episode goes to the nurse for this following exchange:

Nurse: Are you immediate family?
Aria: Uh, no…
Nurse: Then you need to wait outside.

OHHHH BURRRRN. How humiliating must it be to wait outside like a dog that can’t be brought indoors? *lmao* Aria should have lied and just pretended that she was Malcolm’s older sister or something.

Afterwards, Aria goes crying to her mommy and finally comes clean about the whole baby situation. Mama Montgomery comforts her daughter with these thinly veiled lines like: “I’m not mad, just sad” and “Not every relationship is meant to last forever.” It might seem like Ella is being supportive, but you can tell that she was secretly trying to sink the Ezria ship without being too obvious about it.

Ella: Maybe it can work, but it’s also okay if you don’t want it to. *HINT HINT*

Translation of what Ella is *really* saying: Give it up, baby girl! Surrender your man! Quit while you are ahead! ABORT ABORT ABORT!

Aria: I LOVE HIM!!!!! ;__;

And then a single tear trickles down Aria’s cheek in the most melodramatic way. *lolsosad* Seriously, this girl needs to hear some ~*real talk*~ instead of whatever spoon-fed garbage advice that her mommy is giving her. Aria Montgomery, you are a seventeen-year-old teenager. Most girls around your age should only love boy bands and prom dresses and shipping cute couples on television. You have no business getting involved with an adult man who already has a son. You might admire him, you might be smitten with him, you might even feel lustful over him, but you are not in love with him. The sooner you get over this silly schoolgirl crush, the quicker you will realize how woefully misguided you have been all along.

Hands down, the best moment in this episode is when Mama Marin nearly gets hit by a car in broad daylight. If that isn’t karma, I don’t know what is~~~ *lmao*

P.S. I do love the colour block trench coat that Mama Marin is rocking so fiercely. She looks like a stylish Inspector Gadget. :D

Ashley: If he had been REALLY injured, we would have heard about it by now, right? And if he was going to press charges, we would have heard about it by now.

rofl @ this bitch. I love how she’s trying to rationalize her crime – I’m only guilty if he had been REALLY injured. It was clear from her words and actions that Hanna’s mom was only worried about getting arrested. Not once did she show the slightest concern whether Detective Wilden lived or died, and even if she did, it was in the context of: “If he survives, I can plea for a lighter jail sentence from the judge!”

Ashley: Maybe I didn’t hit him as hard as I thought. Maybe he woke up and realized he was in the wrong. Maybe this whole thing is just gonna go away.

Ashley, you ran him over with a car and then flee the scene of the crime instead of bringing him to a hospital. No matter how much of an asshole he is, I don’t think he’s in the wrong here. *lol*

And then, Hanna finds Detective Wilden’s car parked inside her garage. LOLWUT.

Come to think of it, leaving behind the car at the crime scene wasn’t the smartest of ideas, so A actually did them a favour by relocating the vehicle before somebody else finds it. Of course, this also means A is one phone call away from tipping the police to show up at the Marin household with a search warrant and two sets of handcuffs.

The car contains surveillance footage of Mama Marin’s hit-and-run played in a continuous ongoing loop. It was funny to see Hanna react in the same way you get a sick pleasure out of viewing those reaction videos that people post on Youtube as they watch 4Girls16Cups or whatever.

Since there’s no doubt A made hundreds of video copies, the real question is when and where this video will surface next. I hope that A makes a best-of compilation, consisting of this footage and that clip of Ashley getting frisky with Wilden, and then they play the video at her wedding ceremony right in front of Pastor Ted. Hehehe. :)

And then, Hanna pushes Detective Wilden’s car into a lake. LOLWUT.

Sorry, I cannot keep a straight face as I’m writing this. Is it just me or is everything in this godforsaken storyline SO FUCKING BIZARRE??? We’re talking about a hit-and-run where the body has vanished into thin air, where the patrol car was magically transported into a garage, and where said car eventually ended up at the bottom of a lake. The absurdity of this storyline is right up there with Psycho Paige drowning Emily in a swimming pool & Aria flying an airplane with Alison’s pilot boyfriend. I can’t think of a better way to describe these events except for a big fat *LOLWUT*.

This storyline has gotten so ridiculous that it called for an equally absurd resolution. I was going to make fun of Hanna for pushing the car into a lake, but honestly, there might be some genius to her madness. Think about it, even if you called the police tipping them there’s a car at the bottom of the lake, they’d most likely consider you a prank caller and not bother investigating your claim. Who would believe this bullshit??? I witnessed Hanna and Aria pushing the car in, and I’m still having a hard time coming to terms with what actually happened!

Emily: Wait, you dumped his car into a lake!?!?
Hanna: I panicked!
Emily: You’re supposed to stop her from doing stupid things like this, not help!
Aria: I TRIED! O_O

*lol* I think Emily’s reaction sums up what we are all thinking, doesn’t it? To be fair, Aria was pretty vocal about this being a dumbass idea, even though her concerns only came up five seconds before the car went into the lake. Maybe Aria should have “tried” to stop Hanna before she got the police car out of the garage in the first place? See, this is what happens when Spencer isn’t here to supervise the group anymore. You let the brain trust of Hanna and Aria take over the reins, and the results are far from pretty!

And where is Spencer, you ask? Well, I know we all joked about it at one point, but the worst has come true at last. Final destination: Radley Sanitorium. Welcome to the nuthouse, Spencer Hastings!!!

To be honest, I think they should just throw all four pretty little liars into the asylum and call it a day. These dumb bitches pose a danger to themselves and a menace to society. I can’t even with them sometimes. *shakes head* I can’t even!

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37 Responses

  1. Default avatar sara April 28th, 2013 / Sunday

    lol! i hate Malcolm he’s such a dumbass. what 7 year old jumps on the bed like he’s 4? I don’t even think the kid is Ezra’s (not talking about the actor change). Considering PLL got picked up for season 5, I can’t see us having to sit through 2 more whole seasons (and maybe more) of Maggie/Malcolm bullshit. We know the writers are making Ezria endgame and they get rid of everything that gets in their path, hopefully they will get rid of this as well!!

    Not that it matters but I think Ezra just had his door unlocked, Maggie didn’t have a key. We know Aria would freak the fuck out on Ezra if that happened.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 1st, 2013 / Wednesday

      I hope the kid isn’t even Ezra’s and Maggie turns out to be the biggest conniving villain ever. <3 they totally need to do the same to Maggie/Malcolm the same they did to Meredith. Amp up the crazy by a hundred and then send them out of the show forever. Out of the four of characters in that storyline, Aria is actually the most tolerable one for me wtf.

      That's prolly true about the door. I can't imagine Aria would let THAT one slide if it's the case lol.

  2. Default avatar DarkAngel April 28th, 2013 / Sunday

    I think the Rosewood police need to look into the disappearance of Jenna and Toby’s parents, cause I think they are dressed up, rotting and tied to rocking chairs in their basement.

    Now I know when I sent a threatening message to only use the first two letters of a person’s name. So the only kind of person that can figure out who I’m talking about will be a crazy person.

    I practically ran a daycare when I was 15 (I babysat 6 kids) and I never had to take any of them to hospital. Also what kind of wuss is Malcolm the way he was screaming I thought he broke his arm or something. And way to waste money on an expensive emergency room visit for a scraped chin. Wash it, put some neosporin on it and a band-aid and call it day.

    Hanna should never be the brain trust of anything. And Aria being useless is nothing new, so I don’t know why they’d trust her with anything.

    And I wished Toby was dead, but I knew that would never come true. We can’t have the shippers crying and blowing up the internet

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 1st, 2013 / Wednesday

      lmao~ I am seriously worried for their parents too. My theory is that they’re in the witness protection program and adopted new identities just to hide from their stepchildren.

      I can’t imagine how A was planning to threaten Aria or Hanna with that message. We need to be on the lookout for ‘AR’ and ‘HA’ in all future A messages.

      I admit that I am loving Aria’s misadventures with Malcolm. I want to see her get him injured, kidnapped, peddled, and eventually sold into some child smuggling ring in the future. And smh at Malcolm’s overreaction to the teensiest boo boo. DRAMA QUEEN. *rolls eyes*

      We entered into the finale with the possibility that Toby is either evil or dead or both, but of course they opted for neither. Weaksauce.

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

      I DO TOO!! That was such a copout. I seriously rolled my eyes when he goes “Everything I have done was to protect you.” LAME! How interesting would it have been if he had been evil this whole time, but maybe have fallen in love with Spencer along the way? Way better than this crap, I’ll tell you that.

  3. Default avatar Alex April 28th, 2013 / Sunday

    This whole Toby-being-dead storyline killed me. It’s like you said, there’s no way they’d knock off a main character without showing their face. But of course all the crazy fans immediately accepted it and the cast all talked about how sad it was that he got killed off. -_-

    Also, I’m sorry to say I missed the “HE’S DEAD” on my first viewing due to a friend talking, but upon rewatch the next week I heard it and died. That scene was so bad. The whole thing. But Mona’s comment was the cherry on top.

    And say what you will about the endless drawing out of Spencer’s agony and her whole downward spiral, but I thought it easily carried the back half of the season and I think the other storylines proved that. We’re gonna have the whole car in the lake storyline now?

    This show..this show frustrates me.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      OMG, the “HE’S DEAD” scene absolutely slayyyyyed me. I just love the idea of Mona lurking in the bushes just to announce (in a very obvious voiceover) that “he died, bro”. I can’t think about that scene without going *rofl*.

      Without Spencer’s cray, we’d still be discussing how Caleb’s dad stole a $5 bill from the church, so thank lord for her never ending ~*crazy train*~. Spencer is showing so many shades of cray that it never gets old.

      Also, I would like to proclaim the lake in the car is a *jump the shark* moment for the show if only it hadn’t jumped a bajillion times already.

  4. Default avatar DM April 28th, 2013 / Sunday

    Boyd Baxter from Last Man Standing was a much better Malcolm than this kid who is clearly a different race than both of his parents.

    Ashley Marin’s logic is disturbingly the same as the Liars’ was last season: “If Jenna undergoes a major invasive surgery and temporarily gets her eyesight back, does that mean we are no longer responsible for blinding her?”

    I would like to mention that viewers NEVER saw dead Maya’s face. I’m not complaining about it because I always hated her, but the season ended with “they think they found Maya’s body” to season opener 5 months later with everyone over it except Emily and only pretending to still care because it gave them one more thing to blame on Garrett for no reason.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      Impostor Malcolm seriously looks nothing like Ezra. It makes me wonder if they’re setting up a future storyline where he might not be his legit son after all? In Season 4, I hope Maggie goes like “I actually banged the whole football team in high school, but I said you were the real father just because you were the richest one.” And then they get *written out* forever~~~

      The funny thing is the liars and Mama Marin always think the person they’re antagonizing is at fault here. Ashley probably thinks Detective Wilden deserved what he got. <3

      O that's true~ I don't think the show even figured out how Maya died at that time, so they kept things as vague as possible. They just wanted a *death* in the finale and then they'll fill in the details next season.

  5. Default avatar Anonymous April 29th, 2013 / Monday

    Wow an update already? That was fast! I’m impressed!

    I can’t wait to hear your take on the next 3 episodes!

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      Well, the recap was posted two months after the episode aired, so it’s not that quick haha. ^_^”

      I really want to recap the season finale~~~ but I have to go through the other two episodes first because I’m very OCD about keeping the recaps in a chronological order.

  6. Default avatar ANoelle April 29th, 2013 / Monday

    Wow, that was fast!

    OMG when I saw Spencer in that patrol car, I swear, I thought she was dead. It freaked me out so much.

    Spencer’s breakdowns are glorious. I know she’s had quite a few of them, but, Troian is just wonderful and each breakdown just gets more intense. It’s awesome, in a weird way.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      Spencer’s expression was amazing. She looked like a LEGIT crazy person who isn’t even in the realm of human sanity anymore. Troian has been knocking it out of the park in every performance so far. She’s awesomesauce. :)

  7. Default avatar Jay April 29th, 2013 / Monday

    I don’t like Ezria’s storyline, but I don’t agree that she’s not in love with him. I know she’s 17, but if she’s too young to be in love then it wouldn’t make sense that Spencer, Hanna, and Emily can be in love when they are all the same age.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      I don’t have as much of a problem with her *age* as I do with the *object* of her affections, hehe. You’re in love with EZRA!? Come on girl, aim higher.

    • Default avatar Jay May 4th, 2013 / Saturday

      Ian Harding/Ezra is hot. And Ezra is always so sweet to her, what 17 year old wouldn’t fall for that?

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

      Agreed. Ian Harding has a face that looks as though it has been masterfully carved out of ivory. And so does Lucy Hale, so it makes sense that Aria and Ezra would be perfect for each other! haha

  8. Default avatar :D April 30th, 2013 / Tuesday

    yayy! another one! and yeah, just way to go Aria! Your boyfriend is 26, you’re possibly his rebound from his age-apropriate hot ex-fiance, he was your teacher, and he has a son.
    Mama Marin cracks me up. Seriously. She can totally take Aria’s place as a pll.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 3rd, 2013 / Friday

      Mama Marin’s storylines are always so juicy. I think it’s a hilarious direction that her character is gonna become a pastor’s wife in the future. #sinning

      Ezra is basically a scumbag so I actually understand his motivations for pursuing a teenage tail like Aria, but why is Aria so hung up on this dude? Is he really that much of a catch? IDGI!

  9. Default avatar WatchingYou May 1st, 2013 / Wednesday

    BTW the random strange dude from the wood factory to whom Emily talked to was the same guy from a few episodes ago who had Toby’s car.

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 2nd, 2013 / Thursday

      That was earlier on in this same episode.

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 3rd, 2013 / Friday

      For a moment there, I thought you meant the character appeared in another previous episode and we have another ANGIE situation on our hands lol.

  10. Default avatar person May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

    You know, for someone who has claimed that Aria is secretly their favorite character, you do a lot of bitching about her…

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 5th, 2013 / Sunday


      Aria Montgomery is the devil

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

      So do you just not like her anymore or…

  11. Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

    I don’t like how spiteful you are toward the show. It’s not nice for you to criticize it like this, and it’s ESPECIALLY not right for you to criticize the acting, like you have in previous recaps. The acting on this show is fabulous, and all four of the girls work insanely hard. What if they were to see this? You need to tone it down in your recaps, a lot of people are complaining…

    • Default avatar Recap Everything May 5th, 2013 / Sunday


      Aria Montgomery is the devil

    • Default avatar DarkAngel May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

      Troian’s a great actress, the rest are okay. And if you are going to put yourself in the public eye, you are going to be criticized. And sometimes you can tell they are not really into the scene. Ian Harding (Ezra) looks so bored during his scenes and Lucy Hale barely does any acting.

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

      I know it seems that way, but that’s just because of the material they give her. When she’s given a good storyline, she absolutely ROCKS it. That Byron storyline? She was on fire. And those pictures scared the absolute shit out of me, I’m gonna have nightmares tonight…

    • Default avatar Alex May 7th, 2013 / Tuesday

      If you don’t like all the bashing in these recaps of a particular character or the show’s storylines, then don’t read them. Simple as that. Aria’s character is a waste of space when all her storylines focus on her boyfriend. When she’s included in the main plot, which happens less and less these days, she does just fine. And the storylines have gone downhill, especially when compared to season 1. Those are my personal opinions, which I’m entitled to have, just as you are with yours. But if you’re going to bitch about how much the recaps bitch, the easiest answer to give you is just to stop reading them.

    • Default avatar Anonymous May 8th, 2013 / Wednesday

      I don’t read them, but I came across them and whoever does the recapping isn’t just spiteful towards the show, but the actors and actresses as well, and I don’t find that fair to them. So I just felt the need to defend them. And Lucy Hale is a damn good actor, they just haven’t given her sufficient material to showcase it.

  12. Default avatar Anonymous May 5th, 2013 / Sunday

    “He might want to get a paternity test checked out. I don’t know how many other kids that slutbag Maggie has stashed at her house”


  13. Default avatar Anonymous May 6th, 2013 / Monday

    Wait. So if Recap Everything is the devil’s love child, and so is Aria, that means you two are siblings?! #mindblown

    • Default avatar person May 6th, 2013 / Monday

      ahhh so this is all SISTERLY bitching. It all makes sense now!!! hahah

  14. Default avatar Socially Awkward May 7th, 2013 / Tuesday

    This is horrible but I’m actually dying because of those pictures of Aria. Of course this would happen when people in my office are talking about a girl who died over the weekend….

    Now I look like a heartless bitch. Thanks <3

  15. Default avatar anonymous July 27th, 2013 / Saturday

    wow your a bitch. ezria love eachother its not just a crush and these girls are some of the best actresses ive ever seen. when you said all aria should care about is boy bands and promdresses youre wrong. i dont like boybands in fact i hate them so not every teenage girl fits that stereo type. dont forget she is already in seniour year so it would be weird if she still cared about those things. also its not like she lives a typical teenage life, her bestfriend was murdered and she is being tortured by A so no wonder she cares about more than boys and prom.

    • Default avatar A July 27th, 2013 / Saturday


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